Her nails, like razors, scratch at her skin.
This feeling coats her, it wraps around her neck and chokes her.
Gasping for air she cries out but her voice is not heard.
Her shoulders ache from carrying all this weight, will it ever be lifted?
She hangs on, slowly loosing grip.
Her eyes are dry, the last tear fell long ago.
She stands, numb, but she is still standing.
Her heart aches, every beat a reminder of her pain.
Can she walk? Is it possible to move forward?
She holds her breath waiting for the torment in her soul to die.
The screams in her head steal the oxygen, she starts to go down.
Which will hit bottom first?
Her head? Her thoughts howl like demons, taunting her, making her want to lie down, to give in.
Her heart? It pumps pain, sending it through her body and into her soul.
She catches herself and holds on, gasping for air.
Slowly she rises, her eyes focus and she sees clearly.
Her feet, weighed down by the past, slowly start to move.
The screams get louder, making her head throb, should she stop?
Her heart starts racing, pounding fury into her veins.
She stops, takes a deep breath, and closes her eyes.
Her skin becomes rock, keeping the pain hidden, close to her heart.
Her shoulders no longer feel weight, protected by the stiff exterior.
Her head clears, feeling the numbness of nothing.
She takes a step and smiles.
Friday, April 24, 2009
Thursday, April 23, 2009
The New Chapter
Ok, so I know it's been pretty much forever since the last time I blogged... I will get better!!
So it's been a crazy couple of weeks for me. Adam and I applied for a job out at the Y.O. Ranch. It is a 40,000 acre ranch down in the Hill Country of Texas. They have over 55 exotic species to hunt as well as a horse program. Well, we went and interviewed and we got it! Adam will be a hunting guide and a hunting camp counselor and I am going to be the head wrangler. They are also providing housing and meals, which is awesome. They also said we can bring our horses and dogs! Yay!
We have changes to our family, though... We had to sell Evenin, Adam wanted a horse he could ride, which I don't blame him at all. Evening was bought by the nicest man and we got to see where she will live, and she will be really happy with them. We bought a new mare, named Bug, from a really good friend of mine. Adam absolutely loves this horse, and he is doing really well on her. It is so fun to ride with him and goof around. We will have to get rid of most our dogs, though, because we don't need 7 dogs at the ranch. We have homes for all of them and we are just taking Coal and Clutch.
So yeah, this move is a huge life change. I am really excited, because I will be on a horse everyday and help people learn about horses and riding, and I will still be doing camps in the summer. I am also nervous, though, because it's such a huge change! I think once we get the flow of things, we will both fall in love with the job. We are moving a week from Saturday, so it doesn't give us much time to pack! I can't wait to be back in the Hill Country. I love Amarillo, don't get me wrong. It has so much fun outdoor stuff to do like riding and fishing, but it's not like the Hill Country. I can't wait to ride under the big oak trees, swim in the Guadalupe River, and watch the deer graze.
Other than that, there's not much new happening. I traded my truck in for a Jeep Wrangler, and I love it!! It is one of the funnest vehicles I have ever driven! It's navy blue with a tan soft top. It's also a 6 cylendar and has a 3" lift, which is plenty for me! I figure it will get around on a ranch way better than my 2 wheel drive cummins.
So that's a sum of where my life is headed. Adam and I are moving 450 miles south with our two horses and two dogs to work on an exotic game ranch. Oh! They also have giraffes you can pet! And zebras! I will try to figure out how to upload pictures on here, but no promises... haha.
Well, I guess that's enough rambling for now... :)
So it's been a crazy couple of weeks for me. Adam and I applied for a job out at the Y.O. Ranch. It is a 40,000 acre ranch down in the Hill Country of Texas. They have over 55 exotic species to hunt as well as a horse program. Well, we went and interviewed and we got it! Adam will be a hunting guide and a hunting camp counselor and I am going to be the head wrangler. They are also providing housing and meals, which is awesome. They also said we can bring our horses and dogs! Yay!
We have changes to our family, though... We had to sell Evenin, Adam wanted a horse he could ride, which I don't blame him at all. Evening was bought by the nicest man and we got to see where she will live, and she will be really happy with them. We bought a new mare, named Bug, from a really good friend of mine. Adam absolutely loves this horse, and he is doing really well on her. It is so fun to ride with him and goof around. We will have to get rid of most our dogs, though, because we don't need 7 dogs at the ranch. We have homes for all of them and we are just taking Coal and Clutch.
So yeah, this move is a huge life change. I am really excited, because I will be on a horse everyday and help people learn about horses and riding, and I will still be doing camps in the summer. I am also nervous, though, because it's such a huge change! I think once we get the flow of things, we will both fall in love with the job. We are moving a week from Saturday, so it doesn't give us much time to pack! I can't wait to be back in the Hill Country. I love Amarillo, don't get me wrong. It has so much fun outdoor stuff to do like riding and fishing, but it's not like the Hill Country. I can't wait to ride under the big oak trees, swim in the Guadalupe River, and watch the deer graze.
Other than that, there's not much new happening. I traded my truck in for a Jeep Wrangler, and I love it!! It is one of the funnest vehicles I have ever driven! It's navy blue with a tan soft top. It's also a 6 cylendar and has a 3" lift, which is plenty for me! I figure it will get around on a ranch way better than my 2 wheel drive cummins.
So that's a sum of where my life is headed. Adam and I are moving 450 miles south with our two horses and two dogs to work on an exotic game ranch. Oh! They also have giraffes you can pet! And zebras! I will try to figure out how to upload pictures on here, but no promises... haha.
Well, I guess that's enough rambling for now... :)
Saturday, January 24, 2009
The New Addition!
So Adam and I bought a horse yesterday! She is a 2 year old loud dark bay overo mare. I don't normally like mares, but there was something different about her. She had the sweetest, kindest eyes and her and Adam really liked eachother. She is so pretty! She is not broke to ride, so it is going to be a fun project for Adam and I to do together. She looks like she will be built perfect for ranch sorting and stuff like that, so Adam said I could use her to do that, since Tootie is huge... haha. She will be his horse, since I have Tootie. We have to finish building a barn (more a big 3 sided shed, the pen is built) for the horses and then we are bringing her over! She doesn't have a name yet (we don't like the one she has...haha) so Adam is thinking of a name. So far he likes Evenin, so they can be like Adam and Eve...lol. I love that guy. I will put up pictures as soon as we get some!
Thursday, January 22, 2009
Crazy!
Ok, so I am sitting here staring at a mostly blank screen wondering what to write.... It's crazy to think people from all over sit at their computer staring at a blank screen until thoughts start to pour out. It's also weird to think that people from around the world can sit at their computer and look at what I am writing now. So to you out there today, tomorrow, or years from now: Hi! I hope you are having a great day!
I had a great day. Thursday is about to be over, which means one thing.... Friday's almost here!! I rode Tootie today, and he was so awesome. There is nothing like running across a field on the back of a horse. It's addictive.
Today I feel like talking about music. Music can dictate my mood. One minute I am singing full blast to George Straight's "Cowboy's Like Us", the next I am trying to sing like a rockstar to Crossfade's "Cold". Most of the time I like to think I am a rockstar. I have tried to write a few songs, but can't put them to music. Maybe I feel in the shadow of Adam. To all those people out there interested in finding new "It" rockstars, I will introduce to you my husband. I am not just wearing "Wife Goggles". He is amazing. The songs he has written grab your heart. His voice sounds like a raspier version of the GooGoo Dolls. I haven't seen a person yet not mesmirized by his singing. Anyway, I am off my bunny trail and back on the path.... I love listening to lyrics. It's like you get a peek into someone's heart and soul. Listen to "Pieces" by Red, it gave me goosebumps. The perfect combination of lyrics and music can "sooth the soul". It has helped me get through so much. Some people look at me strange when I say that, but sometimes songs say things I can't. It's comforting to know someone is going or has gone through something similiar. It's like you know you aren't alone... The video "Colors" by Crossfade is one of those. 12 Stones also do good ones. I am not so much into videos, though. Most of them take away from the lyrics, I believe. However, I am way more into rock than any other style. I have had guys tell me I am addicted to the "pain" of rock, but really, it's connecting to the artist. Isn't that what music is about? Writing what is on your heart?
Ok, on a lighter note, it's almost the weekend!
I had a great day. Thursday is about to be over, which means one thing.... Friday's almost here!! I rode Tootie today, and he was so awesome. There is nothing like running across a field on the back of a horse. It's addictive.
Today I feel like talking about music. Music can dictate my mood. One minute I am singing full blast to George Straight's "Cowboy's Like Us", the next I am trying to sing like a rockstar to Crossfade's "Cold". Most of the time I like to think I am a rockstar. I have tried to write a few songs, but can't put them to music. Maybe I feel in the shadow of Adam. To all those people out there interested in finding new "It" rockstars, I will introduce to you my husband. I am not just wearing "Wife Goggles". He is amazing. The songs he has written grab your heart. His voice sounds like a raspier version of the GooGoo Dolls. I haven't seen a person yet not mesmirized by his singing. Anyway, I am off my bunny trail and back on the path.... I love listening to lyrics. It's like you get a peek into someone's heart and soul. Listen to "Pieces" by Red, it gave me goosebumps. The perfect combination of lyrics and music can "sooth the soul". It has helped me get through so much. Some people look at me strange when I say that, but sometimes songs say things I can't. It's comforting to know someone is going or has gone through something similiar. It's like you know you aren't alone... The video "Colors" by Crossfade is one of those. 12 Stones also do good ones. I am not so much into videos, though. Most of them take away from the lyrics, I believe. However, I am way more into rock than any other style. I have had guys tell me I am addicted to the "pain" of rock, but really, it's connecting to the artist. Isn't that what music is about? Writing what is on your heart?
Ok, on a lighter note, it's almost the weekend!
Wednesday, January 21, 2009
My First One
Ok, so I have given in to this whole blogging thing.... yay!
To start, my name is Shannon, I am 22 and I just graduated college. WooHoo! I actually loved college, however class would usually get in the way. I am always up for a good time, and I hate scorpions. Good thing they don't have wings to fly.
To start, my name is Shannon, I am 22 and I just graduated college. WooHoo! I actually loved college, however class would usually get in the way. I am always up for a good time, and I hate scorpions. Good thing they don't have wings to fly.
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